I watched a video with Eckhart Tolle titled: Are thoughts the Source of Ego?
In the video, Tolle describes Ego as being the ‘identification with thought’. Within this, the ‘identification with thought’ is where one derives one’s identity / sense of self through thoughts / as thoughts. Tolle describes how thoughts are part of the ‘collective mind‘ of for instance one’s particular culture, and humanity as a whole.
In the video, an audience member describes a particular ‘habitual thought’ she faces, which is that of thinking that ‘I always have to get things right’ – and then if ‘it’s not right’, then she’ll ‘escape’, and just ‘not do it’. Tolle describes how, we may ‘pick up’ thoughts like this for example in childhood as a result of what one’s parents say / do. He describes how the way to be free of such thoughts, is to realize that you’re not the thought itself, but you’re the ‘awareness’ of the thought – where, it’s like there’s ‘you’ as this ‘awareness’ – and then ‘you as this awareness’ can look at / observe the thought and then decide to ‘not identify with it’.
Now, this used to be the kind of thing that really made sense to me, like – ah of course, I’m the awareness that can see the thought coming up / repeating, and therefore I don’t have to ‘identify’ with the thought, I can just be this pure ‘awareness’. And – as this ‘awareness’, life is far more pleasant, because I’m not constantly stressing myself out with thoughts like ‘bad things happen to me’, and ‘I’m not good enough‘, etc, etc. Tolle suggests that in simply ‘not identifying with thoughts’ – one can be free of the Mind, and one does not have Ego.
However, what I’ve since realized through / within my application of breathing, writing, self honesty and self forgiveness, is that this ‘awareness’ I believed / perceived myself to be, was not in fact Awareness, and that in just ‘not identifying with thoughts’ – I was not actually ‘free of my mind’, nor was I free of Ego.
I’ll be walking through this realization over the next few posts so stay tuned.